Archive for January 9, 2009

How’s this for an Apple ad?

This courtesy of sister Nina. My 97-year-old grandmother meeting the boys while they were still in the hospital.

Glad to meet you, Omi!

Glad to meet you, Omi!


January 9, 2009 at 1:03 pm 3 comments

Captain of controversy

Wow what I day I’ve had in the inter-world. Yeah I know I know, you’re not here to hear about my world wide web adventures, but to see pictures of those cute little pumpkins who are just now starting to salivate at the prospect of the 11:30 smorgasbord. But man I tell you, I’ve been through the ringer. I’ve been a lurker and occasional poster at a site called Triplet Connection – to which I’ve dutifully linked here – ever since the day that magic son #3 poked his head through the ether in that second ultrasound of ours back in May. It’s a good site, with a great, helpful forum where people who find themselves in exactly the same straits as Alex and I go to vent or seek advice or just commiserate and rub shoulders. 

As with most web communities, the place is – unfortunately, if you ask me – a bit overrun with internet jargon. There’s one acronym used over there quite often that gets under my skin. Women refer to their husbands as their “DH”s. Now when I see those letters, the first thing, sad to say, that comes to mind rhymes with sick bed. But, after a short while I figured that the collective contempt held by triplet motherhood for ne’erdowell doophus triplet dads worldwide couldn’t have reached such a boiling point that the latter group was officially deemed phallus-noggins one and all. I asked Alex what it meant and she had no idea, but we conjectured together that it was probably something like “designated husband.” 

Anyway, today, between feedings, push came to shove and I opened my big trap, asking why people had to cling to such a silly abbreviation rather than typing out some whole word to represent their supposedly beloved coadministrators. It emerged that DH officially stands for “dear husband,” and that I, for raising the issue:

  1. had too much time on my hands
  2. had never used the internet before
  3. wore my feelings on my sleeve
  4. was “smarty farty” 
  5. was having a MMD (moody man day – I like that one!)
  6. was going to Paree and asking all the locals to speak English, fercryin’outloud. 

For the record, I’ll concede the last two points. But I want to just consolidate my argument against referring to husbands as “DH”s here (I struggled towards this clarity over the course of this day, during which time the full fury of that hallowed web community and their sacred symbols was unleashed upon me). 

So my argument against DH:

  • It is not a universal term, and as such, serves to make outsiders or newcomers feel excluded (all lingo does this, I know). 
  • It, like many other internet abbreviations and acronyms (I used “LOL” as an example, much to my peril) does not really serve as an abbreviation, but as a device of conformity and an emblem of membership in a specific, exclusionary community. You could just as quickly type “husband” as you could DH, but you’d be less of an insider for doing so. (DH always seems to have a nudge and a wink to it for me). 
  • Related to the above, it, like many internet acronyms (LOL, IMHO, LMAO, IYKWIM) basically homogenizes speech, kills original thought and breeds linguistic conformity. Do we really all use these phrases in our day to day life? Do we really call our husbands “dear husbands” without being somewhat sarcastic about it? (I imagine some of us do, and most of us don’t). 
  • It has a tendency to, for lack of a better word, otherize the person in question (the DH). I think dads should be encouraged to participate in parenting when they can, and the use and overuse of DH on forums seems to me to objectify the men in question and cast them in a negative, or at least secondary light. 
  • Sick bed.

Anyway, some of my points. I figured I’d spew them out here in a community where I feel generally loved, after having been beaten up over there. I won’t link to it – but if you’re industrious you could probably ride my link on the right over and find the thread in question. 

Just someone tell me I’m not crazy. Or at least please don’t call the funny farm tonight – I have babies to feed. And more cute pictures of them tomorrow, I promise.

January 9, 2009 at 1:07 am 17 comments

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